Connect with us
Take Control of Your Morning-min
Self Improvement1 day ago

How to Take Control of Your Morning and Have Better Days

How To Take Responsibility for Your Mistakes
Self Improvement2 days ago

How To Take Responsibility For Your Mistakes Without Beating Yourself Up

Organize Your Day for Success
Success & Career2 days ago

7 Ways to Organize Your Day for Success

Why You Are Not As Productive As You Can Be
Self Improvement5 days ago

7 Reasons Why You Are Not As Productive As You Can Be

how to live frugal
Money1 week ago

Easy Ways to Stay Frugal While Living Alone

Ways to Continuously Learn About Yourself
Self Improvement1 week ago

5 Ways to Continuously Learn About Yourself and the World Around You

Failure – Motivational Video
Motivational Videos1 week ago

Failure – Motivational Video

Mindfulness Can Help You Build a Better Business
Entrepreneurship2 weeks ago

How Mindfulness Can Help You Build a Better Business

trust your intuition
Self Improvement2 weeks ago

8 Ways To Trust Your Intuition Or Inner Wisdom

Quotes on Living a Life of Balance
Inspirational Quotes3 weeks ago

55 Inspirational Quotes on Living a Life of Balance

Mark Twain Quotes to Reshape Your Thinking
Inspirational Quotes3 weeks ago

50 Inspiring Mark Twain Quotes to Reshape Your Thinking

So You Have an Idea for An App
Entrepreneurship3 weeks ago

So You Have an Idea for An App. How Can You Take Massive Action To Make It Happen?

funny motivational quotes about work and life
Inspirational Quotes3 weeks ago

Funny Motivational Quotes About Life For Inspiration and Laughs

Morning Quotes to Help You Seize the Day
Inspirational Quotes3 weeks ago

Inspirational Morning Quotes to Help You Seize the Day

Ralph Waldo Emerson Quotes 10
Inspirational Quotes4 weeks ago

37 Ralph Waldo Emerson Quotes On Living A Great Life

rumi quotes about the universe and life
Inspirational Quotes4 weeks ago

Rumi Quotes From His Poems About Love and Life That Will Inspire You

Quotes To Help You Get Through Tough Times
Inspirational Quotes4 weeks ago

30 Uplifting Quotes To Help You Get Through Tough Times

quotes-on-loving-yourself-and-changing-your-life-8
Inspirational Quotes4 weeks ago

Love Yourself Quotes That Will Increase Your Self Esteem

quotes about leaving a bad relationship
Inspirational Quotes1 month ago

Inspirational Quotes about Leaving a Bad Relationship

Ways To Stop Gossip In The Workplace
Self Improvement1 month ago

7 Ways To Stop Gossip In The Workplace Before It Becomes Toxic

Inspiring Quotes about Possibility
Inspirational Quotes1 month ago

30 Inspiring Quotes about Possibility And Your Potential

Uplifting Nature Quotes
Inspirational Quotes1 month ago

30 Uplifting Nature Quotes About Reconnecting with Mother Earth

Ways To Cheer Someone Up
Relationships1 month ago

20 Simple But Creative Ways To Cheer Someone Up

Edgar Allan Poe Quotes
Inspirational Quotes1 month ago

30 Powerful Edgar Allan Poe Quotes about Life from His Books and Poems

Why You Are Not Receiving Compliments
Motivation1 month ago

Can You Receive A Compliment Without It Getting To Your Head?

Recycle Your Pain
Motivational Videos2 months ago

Recycle Your Pain – Motivational Video

Are You Part Of The Problem
Self Improvement2 months ago

Are You Part Of The Problem, Part Of The Solution, Or Part Of The Landscape?

inspirational tupac quotes
Inspirational Quotes2 months ago

Inspirational Tupac Quotes on Thug Life, Success and Destiny

Do You Say It's All Good
Self Improvement2 months ago

Why We Say “It’s All Good”, When It’s Not

Improve Your Quality of Life
Self Improvement2 months ago

5 Habits That Will Improve Your Quality of Life

Chinese Proverbs quotes and sayings about life and love 22
Inspirational Quotes2 months ago

Chinese Proverbs, Sayings and Quotes about Love & Life

Barack-Obama-Quotes-To-Inspire-Motivate-and-Challenge
Inspirational Quotes2 months ago

Barack Obama Quotes About Education, Love and Leadership

dwayne johnson quotes
Inspirational Quotes2 months ago

Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson Quotes On Success and Life To Inspire You

inspirational quotes for kids for more success
Inspirational Quotes2 months ago

Inspirational Quotes For Kids To Inspire Their Best

Keep Going When Your Dream Falls Apart
Motivation2 months ago

3 Ways to Keep Going When Your Dream Falls Apart

Famous Quotes by Famous People 13
Inspirational Quotes2 months ago

Famous Quotes By Famous People Inspiring You To Stay Positive

motivational quotes for athletes
Inspirational Quotes2 months ago

Motivational Sports Quotes About Becoming Legendary and Mindset

inspirational bob marley quotes for his music and lyrics
Inspirational Quotes2 months ago

Bob Marley Quotes On Love, Life and Music

quotes about success and success quotes 333333
Inspirational Quotes2 months ago

50 Achievement Quotes To Inspire You For Greatness

Motivating Success Quotes
Inspirational Quotes2 months ago

20 Motivating Success Quotes That Will Help You Move Forward Faster

Why You Are Not As Productive As You Can Be
Self Improvement5 days ago

7 Reasons Why You Are Not As Productive As You Can Be

Organize Your Day for Success
Success & Career2 days ago

7 Ways to Organize Your Day for Success

Mark Twain Quotes to Reshape Your Thinking
Inspirational Quotes3 weeks ago

50 Inspiring Mark Twain Quotes to Reshape Your Thinking

How To Take Responsibility for Your Mistakes
Self Improvement2 days ago

How To Take Responsibility For Your Mistakes Without Beating Yourself Up

Quotes on Living a Life of Balance
Inspirational Quotes3 weeks ago

55 Inspirational Quotes on Living a Life of Balance

rumi quotes about the universe and life
Inspirational Quotes4 weeks ago

Rumi Quotes From His Poems About Love and Life That Will Inspire You

funny motivational quotes about work and life
Inspirational Quotes3 weeks ago

Funny Motivational Quotes About Life For Inspiration and Laughs

how to live frugal
Money1 week ago

Easy Ways to Stay Frugal While Living Alone

Ways to Continuously Learn About Yourself
Self Improvement1 week ago

5 Ways to Continuously Learn About Yourself and the World Around You

Take Control of Your Morning-min
Self Improvement1 day ago

How to Take Control of Your Morning and Have Better Days

quotes-on-loving-yourself-and-changing-your-life-8
Inspirational Quotes4 weeks ago

Love Yourself Quotes That Will Increase Your Self Esteem

trust your intuition
Self Improvement2 weeks ago

8 Ways To Trust Your Intuition Or Inner Wisdom

Mindfulness Can Help You Build a Better Business
Entrepreneurship2 weeks ago

How Mindfulness Can Help You Build a Better Business

Failure – Motivational Video
Motivational Videos1 week ago

Failure – Motivational Video

Morning Quotes to Help You Seize the Day
Inspirational Quotes3 weeks ago

Inspirational Morning Quotes to Help You Seize the Day

Ralph Waldo Emerson Quotes 10
Inspirational Quotes4 weeks ago

37 Ralph Waldo Emerson Quotes On Living A Great Life

Quotes To Help You Get Through Tough Times
Inspirational Quotes4 weeks ago

30 Uplifting Quotes To Help You Get Through Tough Times

So You Have an Idea for An App
Entrepreneurship3 weeks ago

So You Have an Idea for An App. How Can You Take Massive Action To Make It Happen?

Categories

Relationships

5 Tips for Maintaining a Healthy Intimate Relationship

Published

on

intimate relationship

Issues with intimacy are one of the top issues that couples report when they enter couples therapy.

They have lost the “spark”. They have stopped being affectionate. They have ceased expressing appreciation. They often have started to sleep in separate rooms for various reasons. There are many reasons that intimacy starts to dwindle between couples, but it is essential to find ways to stoke the fires and keep them burning.

Intimacy and affection are an essential part of maintaining a healthy relationship – but it takes work. For most couples, after time, children, stress, and the burdens of life, intimacy can start to take a back seat to other things, like sleep.

Intimacy starts to move down the priority list, which in a way is saying that the relationship has moved down the priority list, too. Intimacy is an essential function of a happy and healthy relationship.

So what are some things that can revive an intimate relationship? The answers may not be what you think.

 

How To Maintain an Intimate Relationship

1) Appreciate your partner.

intimate relationship

Each partner should do an exercise of telling the other something that they appreciate about the other, daily, for a set amount of time. This is an “assignment” I often give couples. It does not matter if it is face to face, by note, dry erase board, e-mail or SMS. It only matters that you say it.

Couples ALWAYS come back to me. Although they were hesitant at first, they are beaming about the exercise. They find out things their partner appreciated about them that they never knew. They are reminded that their partner notices and does appreciate the small things they do – they just stopped verbalizing it.

More couples tell me they are going to keep this as part of their routine, as it really does make them feel closer to each other. Constant appreciation is vital in an intimate relationship.

 

2) Open communication is key. 

intimate relationship

While that might seem obvious, this is another top reason couples enter therapy. This spans many arenas when it comes to a healthy, close, and intimate relationship. It starts with the couple’s ability to be able to communicate honestly and openly with each other on pretty much all topics.

If a couple feels that they can’t share things with their partner honestly, they start to shut down and distance starts to be created. This also plays out in their intimate life, because if they can’t talk openly about normal everyday issues, they are not likely to talk about their intimate wants and needs in an open and comfortable manner.

So, getting to the root of healthy communication will help to improve many areas of the relationship, which makes intimacy easier to express.

 

3) Practice shared respect in the relationship.

intimate relationship

This is another key factor in establishing and maintaining affection and intimacy. When partners sense mutual love and respect for each other, they want to be close to this person. They maintain a certain level and type of attraction to them.

When a partner feels that they are NOT respected by their partner, that they are not seen as an equal, that their partner does not think their work or parenting style is up to par, they start to feel resentful and grow distant.

Respect is probably one of the key issues that start to create unpleasant feelings and distance in a couple. Think about how hard it would be to be close and affectionate to someone you felt did not have a fundamental respect for you. We would struggle to want to be close to that person.

However, think about how much easier it would be to be affectionate in an intimate relationship where you felt not only respected, but supported as well.

 

4) Maintain trust.

intimate relationship

Trust is another key issue when it comes to affection and intimacy in a relationship. Trust spans many levels. If you do not trust someone to be honest and faithful to you, you would really struggle to open yourself up to them in this way and be vulnerable. You would have feelings of resentment, questions, and a level of instability that fosters distance and questioning instead of closeness and honesty.

The other layer of this is that a couple needs to have a deep level of trust in their partner to have a healthy and open level of intimacy. If you do not trust your partner, you are not only going to withhold your wants and needs, you are not going to trust them to respect your boundaries and limits.

This can be extremely detrimental to an intimate relationship. It can leave each member of the couple on guard instead of being completely comfortable and open to one another. This typically leads to a lack of intimacy, and even a complete stop to it.

So, talk out issues, express concerns, and make sure that you are comfortable with one another.

 

5) Never pressure your partner when it comes to intimacy.

intimate relationship

We have to understand that we are all going to have times when we are NOT at the same level of energy, want, and desire as our partner. They will have times when they want to be close and we are just not there that day.

Have the respect to know that it is natural. That it is not about us, and being human and not being in the mood, being tired, or just not having it in us at that time, is totally OK.

I think one of the most important takeaways is to remember that it is NOT you! Do not take it personally. One of the most damaging things you can do is make your partner feel bad for not being in the mood, or not being able to perform.

Making them feel shamed or guilty about it, is the surest way to make sure that it happens again. I cannot stress enough the long term damage you can do to your intimate relationship if you make your partner feel like there is something wrong, that you feel rejected, or that they are at fault for being honest about not being in the mood at a given time.

Always remember that they are human, as are you. And if you are being honest, you are not in the mood at all times, too.

Are you taking care of YOUR intimate relationship?

Keep these key pointers in mind, and you will have a solid base for a healthy intimate relationship. Hold hands, kiss, and tell each other why you love one another. The little things add up to a lot in the health and stability of your relationship. Mutual trust, respect, and the support of one another also goes a long way to keep that fire alive.

There is something about feeling supported, about knowing your partner is not only physically, but is mentally attracted to you as well. If you can keep those things in mind, and truly make a diligent effort in practicing them, you can be assured you will have a healthy intimate and emotional life for the long haul.

Advertisement
Click to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *