Humans are social. Most of us generally like to be around other people the majority of the time. When you aren’t, it can sometimes make you feel lonely. But it doesn’t have to be that way.
Here are five tips to help transform your loneliness into meaningful time for self reflection and improvement.
How To Transform Loneliness Into Meaningful Time for Self Reflection
1) Change your mindset.
The first way to transform loneliness into self reflection is to change your way of thinking. You might feel lonely, but it’s important to ask yourself WHY. Most likely, it’s not because people don’t want to spend time with you. Rather, it’s just a situation you’re in at the moment.
See it as a blessing to gather your thoughts and address problems you might not know you’re dealing with. If you’re scared of being alone, that’s something else that you should get to the bottom of (Tip #4 will help with this).
As a general rule (unless something is putting you in a dangerous/harmful situation), it is always better to face your fears than run from them. If your fear is loneliness, NOW is your time to address it.
Your mental, emotional, and physical health is all connected. Try going on a relaxing jog or doing yoga. When you exercise, it releases endorphins that helps you feel better emotionally and mentally as well. It will help clear your mind, putting you in a more positive position for self reflection.
If you can, exercise outside. Being out in nature and viewing the scenery and animals will help pull your focus outwards and make you less worried about what’s going on inside. It can also be calming and soothing.
If you’re looking for something a little more intense, buy a heart rate monitor. Try to reach your “target heart rate” every day and do more and more intense workouts. Not only will it be taking your mind off your so-called loneliness, you can also make yourself stronger and focus on the positive steps you’re taking.
Really, any time you’re alone but you want to be with other people, try to do something that makes you a better person or improves your life. If your house is messy, start cleaning. No matter what else happens in the day, you will have taken ONE step forward to becoming more organized and feeling better about yourself.
Clutter doesn’t help your life in any way. If you find things you didn’t even know you had or wanted, donate them or sell them online. You can make some extra money AND it will put you in a “self-improvement” mindset. This can have a snowball effect into making you want to improve other parts of your life.
As you go through old stuff, it can also remind you of your past (that may be good or bad). If it is negative, it is a good time to address those feelings through self reflection. If it’s positive, it will help cheer you up.
Either way, going through your stuff and cleaning will help you reflect upon your life, where you were, and where you want to go.
Clear your head by free writing for 10 minutes. Just write down whatever is on your mind. Afterwards, be a bit more thorough with your writing. You can split up your time in whatever way you want. But some good options are writing about what’s sticking in your head, goals you want to accomplish, and some of your favorite memories.
This will help organize your thoughts and will serve as a record for the future. Sometimes “rosy retrospection”, or remembering the past as better than it really was, occurs (you can also think of the past as worse). Re-reading your journal will help you to remember what it was really like. As a result, you can make more informed decisions based on your past.
Additionally, you can write songs, poems, short stories, or articles based on your own experience. There is a reason that the topic of “loneliness” comes up so much in song writing. Writers usually feel alone; so they turn their loneliness into something that people can enjoy.
Turning your feelings into art (paintings or drawings work, too) can make you feel like you’re contributing something beautiful to society (if you choose to show/tell people). It’s also a great avenue to express your emotions to help you move on.
5) Stay grateful and positive.
Don’t get down on yourself because you feel lonely at the moment. It is only a moment and it will pass. Write down 10 things you love about yourself. This is also a good exercise to do daily when you wake up in the morning.
Also, write down a list of what you’re thankful for. There are so many things that we take for granted everyday! When you write them down, you realize just how much you have. You’re most-likely someone who is living with running water, food, shelter, and a lot more to be grateful for.
Realizing WHO you are and what you have is a great way to kill loneliness. Use this time for self reflection and see what’s really important in life.