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7 Tips To Becoming More Fearless In Your Daily Life



7 Tips To Becoming More Fearless In Your Daily Life

If you were to look up fearless, in the dictionary, you will see that it’s defined as an adjective that means to be without fear; to be bold or brave; intrepid.  When it comes to fearlessness, I find that there are usually two kinds of people.  There are those that are perfectly happy following rules and paths that were set by someone else.  They go with the flow in every aspect of their life ensuring that they don’t “rock the boat” in anyway to have a calm, predictable yet fulfilling life.  The other group of people will flip the boat all the way over in order to find their true happiness even though it’s the “road less traveled” and has unknown results.

How can you become more fearless during life’s challenges?

Fear is probably one of the most powerful feelings we possess.  Think about it…what keeps you at a job for 10 years when you knew that you despised it after 2 years??  It was the fear of not being able to find another job that will actually make you happy while paying the bills.  What keeps people in a longterm relationship despite the fact that they hate coming home because they have to see him or her?  I’ll tell you…it’s the fear that you won’t find anyone else which means you will be alone and miserable for the rest of your life.  Fear controls so much of what we do simply because the fear of the unknown is too much to bear.  Especially if what you have been doing is working.

Too much of life is spent worry about things that will never happen…

Most of my life was spent living in fear.  Sitting in a cubicle at the same job for over 13 years knowing that it would lead to nothing but a steady paycheck.  Afraid to apply for a nicer car than the one that I was driving because I was afraid to be declined by the bank.  Fearful of submitting an application to be a fitness trainer because I was afraid they wouldn’t think I was “fit enough” (even though I spend hours weekly exercising).  Staying in a unhealthy, miserable relationship because I was too afraid of what would happen after breaking up with him.  Yep, fear controlled every single part of my life.  Until one day, out of the blue, I sat for a long while pondering, “what the hell am I so afraid of?”.  The only answer that I came up with at the time was simply not knowing what could happen.  That was it?!  And just like that, I switched from being of afraid of everything to throwing fear right out the window and moving.


Being fearless doesn’t mean you’re not scared of anything.  It just means that you are putting the fear to the side and doing it anyway.  Fear can hold us back from living the life that we truly want to live.  If you are ready to take a leap into “the fearless life”, take a look at these 7 tips that can help you get there:

1.) Shake The Haters Off 

Haters will hate and there’s nothing that you can do about it.  You have to learn to not let others criticism of your choices, affect your path.  Remain confident that you will accomplish the goals you’ve set, no matter what others think.  Need help coming up with responses?  Try these: “It’s nice of you to offer advice but I’m good. Thanks for offering!”

“Yes, I’m sure this is what I want to do”

“I’ve done my research and I’m on the path to fixing the issue”

“Thanks for the referral! I’ll be sure to contact him/her if I need help

2.) Keep Your Business To Yourself

Learning when to keep your business to yourself is so important.  New business ideas can be so exciting that you can’t wait to share with others.  But think before you speak.  Unfortunately, telling everyone about your next move will only increase your fear because people love giving unsolicited advice.  Which can lead to giving you doubt.  Fear and doubt don’t work good together.  As a matter of fact, they don’t belong together at all.   Don’t tell people about you new ideas, plans, or goals until you have gotten to a point where they can see it happening.  Keep your mouth closed and let your actions do the talking.

3.)  If At First You Don’t Succeed, Dust Yourself Off And Try Again

Trial and error will be an effective tool in your fearless life.  Understand that somethings you attempt may not work out the first time.  Whether you are opening a new business or moving across the world, there will be challenges.  The key is to find a way to overcome them, learn from them and continue on your path.

4.) You aren’t Beyonce, boo

Social media has its benefits and drawbacks, for sure.  Who doesn’t enjoy scrolling through IG pics of Bey shopping at the finest stores and opening successful businesses with the most perfect family that you have ever seen.  But who the heck knows what’s going on when the camera is off and the filters aren’t added?!  Remember, everyone is different and will have a different path.  Breaking your bank account to follow her style and taking trips around the world won’t make you Beyonce, boo!   If you are constantly comparing yourself to others, you will never find your fearless life path.  The only difference between the “successful” people and you is their drive and determination.  YOU are YOU…be confident in that.  Find your own path to follow and let it take you wherever YOU want to go.


5.)  There Are No Do-Overs

It may sound cliche but the real truth is that you only live once, there are no second chances or do-overs.  If you plan on being fearless then you should make the most of absolutely every opportunity that presents itself and is aligned with your goals.  If you have the opportunity that you can’t pass up comes along…DON’T!


6.) What’s The Worst That Can Happen?

Taking risks for a bigger reward is definitely scary but what’s the worst that can happen? You may be told, “no” and you may even have to try something else.  Last I checked, no one died from hearing the word “no” or from failing at something.


7.)  Daydream

When fear comes up, one of the first thoughts that pop into our head is probably all of the bad things and/or obstacles you might face.  But you have to re-train the way you think. Focus on how great life will be once you do it!  The satisfaction you will feel by starting your own business, the free time you will have with your family by taking a less demanding job, the freedom you will feel after selling all of your things and living in a tiny house in the middle of woods.  It will all be worth it!


Be confident in who you are, what you can achieve in your quest to live fearlessy in happiness.  Keep these tips in mind throughout your journey.  They are sure to assist you along the way.

Remember, never give up on something you want.  It may be difficult to fight through and wait but it will be even more difficult to regret.

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Can You Receive A Compliment Without It Getting To Your Head?



a compliment (1)

Receiving compliments gracefully isn’t as easy as it should be for some people. How about you: are YOU ready for someone to give you a pat on the back? To be pushed to doing more? To have someone give you a supporting hand? To be picked up when you fall down?

Sure, we may think that’s what we want. But is it what we need to develop, to grow, and to get better?

If someone complimented you on every little improvement you made while learning a new skill, would you not start to feel a bit marginalized? That perhaps they didn’t really think you could do it? What about when you do something that seems pretty easy and everyone made it into a big deal?


Receiving Compliments When You Are Not Ready For It

Why You Are Not Receiving Compliments

Developing new skills is never free of trouble. We all know the level of foundation that must be built to get from being a novice, before reaching greatness. In the learning process, we all know when we are in that frustrating stage of not being quite as good – but we know what we have to do to get there.

It’s in these moments that receiving compliments on your every action could minimize your efforts. That’s because if they truly knew you, people would be holding out for when you make that big, defining leap. 

As we overcome hurdles in our learning and development, friends, family members, and colleagues will know when the time is right to provide encouragement. They know that when that moment comes, those words will have the right amount of impact on you.

Think back to when you were growing up, playing some elaborate game. Perhaps you spent hours creating this game: building a fort, putting together things that the rest of your characters in the play could use. You pushed through despite the trials and problems.

It would have served absolutely no purpose for someone to congratulate you on every step (and misstep) along the way.  You would have lost your flow as you worked through the problem, constantly being interrupted – all while you were still trying to figure it out and understand where you needed to go.

Why You Are Not Receiving Compliments


When Receiving Compliments Makes You Content with Present Achievements

You might never have finished if someone patted you on the back early in that moment, content in the knowledge that you “thought up” the idea and that was enough. If everyone was saying you did great simply for thinking up something new, would it have compelled you to stop?

Maybe. Perhaps you would have stopped with that compliment.

As a parent, you learn when to encourage your children. Usually, it’s not when they show up, and not when they do what kids around them are able to do as well. It’s when they push themselves to do more. When they pick themselves up and still lose, when they try something new for the first time, fall over and fail, not sure if they should do it again.

Those are the moments when kids should be receiving compliments – NOT when they have done the same thing over and over again, or when they didn’t try their best but won anyways.

Kids know this. They can feel it when people give false compliments or encouragement because they did something they’ve always done. But when it is something meaningful, something they have worked hard for, they know the encouragement will be there to help them.

Why You Are Not Receiving Compliments

The reason you might not be receiving compliments or encouragement when you want to is because you haven’t earned them or don’t deserve them yet.

Maybe your coaches, leaders, parents, or other people who support you know you are not ready for it. Perhaps they need to see you making that next big leap in your growth and development.

Those compliments might not come today, tomorrow, next week, next month, or next year. But look at those around you – the great people you have chosen to surround yourself with – and you’ll see that they are waiting to give you that push. They are waiting for you to make it happen.

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3 Ways to Keep Going When Your Dream Falls Apart




when your dreams are falling apart (1)

I truly believe that dreams must extend beyond wishes of self-improvement; that its goal should be to contribute to the world around you.

The heart is a fickle thing. Imagine how many amazing things wouldn’t have been accomplished if great minds simply stopped when they “didn’t feel like it”.

It’s human nature. I’m sure that during the course of over 300 bank rejections, Walt Disney had days when he felt like giving up. But he didn’t. He kept going. Why? It was because his dream went far beyond himself.

Here’s how YOU can keep going – even if it feels like your dreams are falling apart.


3 Ways to Keep Going When Your Dream Falls Apart

1.) Remember The “Why”

Keep Going When Your Dream Falls Apart

Often times, I find that dreams extend far beyond the simple purpose of making one happy. For example, being a songwriter in and of itself does not make me feel happy and fulfilled. Imagine if my life’s work was to write songs that no one would ever hear. That doesn’t elicit any feelings of happiness or fulfillment (at least to me).

Seeing and hearing the healing effects that come from the songs I create for others to hear? Now you’re talking. Healing and helping others is the part of my dream that keeps it alive. It gives me purpose in this world that goes far beyond myself and my skills.

I’m reminded of the character Ebenezer Scrooge from Dickens’ “A Christmas Carol”. Scrooge’s goal in life was to have money – and lots of it. He set aside love and relationships for that dream. The result of this life goal was a lonely, cold, bitter old man.

I won’t ruin the whole story for the very few of you that may not have heard it. In the end, Scrooge discovered that what brought him fulfillment and happiness were community and generosity.

So what is the “why” to your dream? How is your dream going to affect those around you? Get beyond yourself. As many have said, YOU are your biggest obstacle to success.


2.) Take Off The Rose-Colored Glasses

Keep Going When Your Dream Falls Apart

You know what I’m talking about. The “I’m going to make it big” and “I’m going to famous/rich/etc.” I hate to take a pointy realistic needle to your big ideas, but I’m doing it out of love. Here it is:

Your dream isn’t going to look exactly how you pictured it.

Take a minute to take that one in. Still here? Yes. Alive? Yes. Not Bleeding? No? Hurt a bit?

It’s OK. I know. I’ve been there. Dreams are vulnerable. We spend countless hours imagining what it would be like and how we will get there. But the truth is, in my experience, they have never turned out exactly how I have imagined. Why? We live in a world of people and circumstances that we can’t control.

Here is where the “why” comes in. The beautiful thing is that your works are a direct result of your heart’s intention…and what you put out into the world never comes back void. Here’s an example:

As a singer-songwriter, the common idea of making it big for my line of work is to have a hit song or perform in front of a sold-out crowd at Madison Square Garden (I’m more inclined towards Red Rock Amphitheatre, but you get the picture).

Let’s say that I work and strive tirelessly to do everything I need to do to reach that goal. I release a song, I tour around the US, develop a large following, get on the radio, etc. Along the way, I hear stories of how this song has impacted the people who have heard it. Stories describing how it brought healing, encouragement, and hope.

To go further, what if I never even make it that far? What if circumstances happen and I can’t tour? What if everything “falls apart”? What if I end up playing at open mics for the rest of my life? What if it doesn’t happen in the next year? Two years?

Does that change the fact that my song helped heal and open the heart of a broken and depressed Vietnam Vet? Or how it helped encourage an author to keep going and writing? Or how my song started a conversation on how to look past the labels overshadowing soldiers and their families?

It’s all about your perspective of success, my friend. To me, because my “why” and my heart’s intention are to help people, those stories above are my version of success. It’s what keeps me going. If I get to Madison Square Garden (or Red Rocks), well that’s just icing on top of the cake.

Keep going on your dream. Make a plan, and in the words of .38 Special, “Hold on loosely, but don’t let go.” Roll with the punches and understand that even greater things can come when things don’t go according to your plan.


3.) Make Your Dream Your Job

Keep Going When Your Dream Falls Apart

No, I don’t mean quit your job and have no income while you work on your dream. That’s an entirely different article (and completely up to you). I’m talking about treating your dream like it is your job.

For example, if you completely failed at a presentation at work, would you just quit and not go the next day? No! You have a livelihood and an expectation to show up. So why quit on your dream at the first sign of failure?

Treat your dream like your job. Make a plan, show up every day, and understand that it may take a while to see any results. I know many songwriters who wrote hundreds of songs before they wrote a hit. However, they never would have reached it if they didn’t take that first step, made a commitment, and wrote 100 songs first.

Dreams don’t just happen. They take work. So go get started!

My best advice under this theme is check out the book “The War of Art” by Steven Pressfield. It is by far the best resource I have discovered in my journey of living out my dream.

Here’s the deal. With every goal that I have set and achieved, I never sat at the end and thought to myself, “man, look at what I did”. Believe it or not, I was more overwhelmed with the thoughts of the journey that I had to take to get there – the good and the bad.

I would admire and laugh at the unexpected things that came. I would smile and enjoy the character it built, the person that I became in the process. In the end, the best thing about dreams and goals isn’t their achievement, but the journey that you take to get there.

Never forget that the dream in your heart was put there for a reason. You were made to make an impact on this world.

Enjoy the journey and never, ever give up. Keep going.

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